Excuses are common place in our world. An excuse is a choice that is made - when my kids at home start the "excuse" language my response is... Choices have consequences, how do you plan to handle yours? I use the phrase with the kids in my classroom as well. It is important that they see that actions whether positive or negative have consequences.
I really have trouble with the "you choose to" thing. There are way too many situations where the student really does not have the power to make their parents comply with school timelines or whatever. These kids need to be helped to learn how to deal with the reality of their situation appropriately. I feel that if hit with the "you choose to" remark once or twice, they will simply withdraw, be negative about school in specific, life in general, or who knows what.
Like Sue, I have some trouble with this one too. Although it is important for kids to be accountable, some things are out of their control. It seems to me that at times this could be a contradiction to the other reading "Different people have different needs."
I can see both sides of this. One, I know a teenager who gives 'excuses' for almost everything big and small and these excuses have been accepted again and again. This particular teenager has a poor work ethic, poor follow through, and can't be counted on for anything. I feel that if this person were held more accountable along the way, his life and relationships would be easier. That said, on the other side of the coin,I agree that students don't have complete control over their situations, so wiggle room is a must. It just can't be 'always' and for every little thing. Every time you move the line in the sand back for a child, they'll take it. Therefore, you need to be understanding, but sometimes the line needs to stay where it is. Does that make sense? I think I can say what I mean on this one better than I can write it.
This is a tough one. I often see parents making excuses for their children. When I have a child who frequently doesn't turn in homework, I talk to the parents. If they make excuses about not having time or whatever, I again explain the reasons for homework, then I give them some power. I tell them that if they have a legitimate reason for not being able to help their child they should write a note on the homework packet and send it in. Their child is not punished. Parents rarely take advantage of this, but instead help their child complete the work. Most parents will take responsibility if we expect it of them.
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Excuses are common place in our world. An excuse is a choice that is made - when my kids at home start the "excuse" language my response is... Choices have consequences, how do you plan to handle yours? I use the phrase with the kids in my classroom as well. It is important that they see that actions whether positive or negative have consequences.
I really have trouble with the "you choose to" thing. There are way too many situations where the student really does not have the power to make their parents comply with school timelines or whatever. These kids need to be helped to learn how to deal with the reality of their situation appropriately. I feel that if hit with the "you choose to" remark once or twice, they will simply withdraw, be negative about school in specific, life in general, or who knows what.
Like Sue, I have some trouble with this one too. Although it is important for kids to be accountable, some things are out of their control. It seems to me that at times this could be a contradiction to the other reading "Different people have different needs."
I can see both sides of this. One, I know a teenager who gives 'excuses' for almost everything big and small and these excuses have been accepted again and again. This particular teenager has a poor work ethic, poor follow through, and can't be counted on for anything. I feel that if this person were held more accountable along the way, his life and relationships would be easier. That said, on the other side of the coin,I agree that students don't have complete control over their situations, so wiggle room is a must. It just can't be 'always' and for every little thing. Every time you move the line in the sand back for a child, they'll take it. Therefore, you need to be understanding, but sometimes the line needs to stay where it is. Does that make sense? I think I can say what I mean on this one better than I can write it.
This is a tough one. I often see parents making excuses for their children. When I have a child who frequently doesn't turn in homework, I talk to the parents. If they make excuses about not having time or whatever, I again explain the reasons for homework, then I give them some power. I tell them that if they have a legitimate reason for not being able to help their child they should write a note on the homework packet and send it in. Their child is not punished. Parents rarely take advantage of this, but instead help their child complete the work. Most parents will take responsibility if we expect it of them.
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