Sunday, November 9, 2008

Okay who did it?

7 Comments:

At November 10, 2008 at 2:36 PM , Blogger christy wagner said...

It seems to me that as educators we also need twenty five seconds to stop and think about our answers or reactions to situations. Wait time gives us the power to stop and think of the correct words we want to use in addressing a specific situation. Let our words reflect our answers also!

 
At November 10, 2008 at 7:09 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

So true, I agree with Christy everyone needs to take a moment to think prior to letting the words tumble. I am sure it would save a great deal of later frustration if our words focused on what needs to done rather than on who was responsible.

 
At November 11, 2008 at 8:25 PM , Blogger Jo said...

Asking who did it is as pointless as asking why did you do it. Children are put on the defensive and problems cannot be solved when someone is made to feel guilty and or uncomfortable. Problem solving takes a real desire to help not blame. I agree, examining our motives leads us to choosing better words to get better results.

 
At November 12, 2008 at 7:36 AM , Blogger Peggy said...

I agree with Jo. Adults, as well as children, get defensive if confronted. It's human nature. When a child feels blame, the truth is hard to extract. As educators, we need to choose our words wisely and focus on how to fix the situation, rather than going on a "witch hunt" to find the responsible party.

 
At November 12, 2008 at 10:11 AM , Blogger Lyn said...

I am going to try the 25 second pause before reacting. I am guilty of asking who and I agree that isn't important in most situations.

 
At November 14, 2008 at 7:14 AM , Blogger tnicks said...

I agree with both Christy and Karen, but there are times when the words come out before you can stop them. I think part of the learning process is to stop and notice what you just said and make a correction. We are human and there are days when the stress of daily classroom activities get to us. I find myself asking, "What's the problem?" "Who did it" just has them placing blame on someone else.....no one wants to own up to things these days.

 
At November 16, 2008 at 6:49 PM , Blogger Sue Bast said...

I haven't used this statement with my adult students. But used it with my children until I read an article that basically offered the same reasoning. I did get beter results when I used the feeling statement.

 

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